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Celestion

1.

The Queen’s Condition

Lore

[A medical assessment of the Aurin queen’s health based on an examination recently conducted by a Mordesh doctor.]

PATIENT QME-1

SYMPTOMS: Fatigue, chronic pain, dizziness, nausea, insomnia.

DIAGNOSIS: QME-1 has a unique primal connection to her homeworld. It appears her connection to Arboria is traumatizing her every time the Planet Reapers turn a tree to dust. The distance from the Aurin Homeworld has, according to the
patient’s own assessment, only caused symptoms to increase in intensity. Lacking a more plausible explanation that would defy all known primal physics, I hypothesize that proximity to Nexus and the intense sources of primal life energy in Aurin territories amplifies the patient’s sensitivity to these fluctuations in what her kind call “the Weave.”

RECOMMENDATIONS: Although the patient is able to achieve a stable equilibrium using
personal meditation techniques, drawing on primal life sources on Nexus, and simply by getting rest, this situation cannot continue if the patient is to survive. The effort to suppress the pain of Arboria and still function in her role as monarch is taking a severe toll.

I find this particularly frustrating as a doctor, for the solution to this ailment is simple. The patient is capable of severing the connection to Arboria. She insists that, once severed, she would be unable to
reestablish the same thread in this “Weave,” and so she refuses to follow this guaranteed course of relief.

Pending the patient’s willingness to follow the recommended treatment, a continued course of natural alchemical pain remedies is all I can offer.

ADDITIONAL: Medical conscience compels me to bring my concerns to the First Consort. The patient is too important to her people, and to us all, to allow her to go on
this way. Perhaps he can convince her to do what must be done. I fear he will instead recommend they return to their homeworld, where they will surely die.

I should really find the organ containing my medical conscience and replace it with something more useful.

Guide

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Celestion

1.

Arborian Fables (Footnotes)

Lore

[This is a collection of short parables and morality tales from the Aurin homeworld Arboria, complete with handwritten and surprisingly detailed footnotes appended.]

FOOTNOTES

pp. 2-7 – This story is, as sharp-eared readers probably already guess, the basis of the famous ballad “The Consort Loves the Tree More Than Me But That’s Okay.”

p. 9 – A specific numeric breakdown: 76 feathernoses, 12 barkbeetles, 58 garr, 2
jabbits, 19 unidentified rodentoids, and a single fruiting body from the Oldest and Wisest Tree in the Universe.

p. 16 – “Matrias After Midnight” is believed to have officially ceased regular publication in 1457 A.E. and is banned in most Aurin communities.

p. 27 – The mature Arborian barkbeetle queen can lay 420,000 eggs per day for thirteen days before dying of exhaustion, which is why this joke is funny if you’re an Aurin.

p. 31 –
Most sources agree Matria Slaughterbark of Gullyflower Hollow was eventually caught and served seventeen years for racketeering, conspiracy to commit fraud, and twenty-one counts of earclipping in the first degree. The charges of murder, plant abuse, plant murder, and being really mean were dropped for lack of proof.

p. 37 – Yes, “Treerotica” is really a word.

[The bottom of the page reads “Continued on next facing page,” but that page appears to be missing. That’s probably for the best.]

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Celestion

1.

The Vengeance of Chesh

Lore

[This handwritten story of revenge and mayhem stars and purports to be the work of Chesh. Specifically, that would be Chesh the Plushie.]

Chesh drew his crossbow and scoffed at the dragon’s threats.

“Scoff!” said Chesh. “I, Sir Chesh Snuggywums Cutie-Tootie Wubwub Widdle Huggable Longbranch, have the aim of an Exile Spellslinger and the heart of a fierce jungle cat! I also have the Magic Crossbow of Heroic Purpose and Bravery! As you know, this
makes me quite handsome! And deadly.”

“Then you will find that plushies can be both flammable… and inflammable!” snarled the dragon.

“Anything can be both flammable and inflammable, dragon jerk!” laughed Chesh. “They mean the same thing!”

“Oh,” the dragon mumbled, a bit chagrined, and released a burst of embarrassed smoke. “You mean like ‘famous’ and ‘infamous’? Some knight I scorched called me ‘infamous,’ and I thanked
him before I boiled him alive in his armor, but now I’m not so sure I did the right thing.”

“A truly infamous act!” Chesh agreed. “But that’s a bad example. You see, those words both mean ‘well-known,’ but if you’re famous you’re well known for good things, and if you’re infamous you’re well known for bad things.”

“Eh, so long as I’m well-known!” the dragon laughed. “And now I’m going to be well-known as the dragon who incinerated Sir
Chesh Snuggywhatevers! Snarl! Roar!”

Chesh drew a bead on the dragon’s left eye and smiled. “Here’s lookin’ at you, jerk.”

[Either there’s more to this plushie than meets the eye, or Fenosha Longbranch’s psyche has taken a beating since the Dominion invaded Arboria and drove the Aurin to Nexus.]

Lore

Grant me the peace of the forest,
Guardians of old
Hold me aloft in your branches,
Wise Ones of home

Grant me the will of the hunter,
Watchers of woods
Wreath me in shadow and night,
Wise Ones of home

Grant me balance in my soul,
Matrias all
Heal my heart with your courage,
Queen of all Aurin

Grant me the will to fight,
Tooth and claw
Let the spirits show the path before me,
When I walk beyond the Weave

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Celestion

1.

An Offering to the Lightkeeper

Lore

Hear me, Lightkeeper, for my heart is heavy, and this world is full of horrors.

The machines come for us. They hunt us day and night. The queen says they did not follow us. They could not. But how can she be certain? She said they would not take our world from us, that the Wise Ones would hold strong, that our allies would find us and save us. She thinks they saved us.

But what did they save us for? And what did they save us
from?

Every night, I hear them. The mighty blades, swinging and sawing through the very heart of the forest. I hear the screams of the trees as the Reapers cut them down. Things live in the treetops. The Aurin, the other creatures of the forest… all dead… a rain of blood.

Did you hear our cries, Lightkeeper? Did you see the scarlet drops cascade down from the canopy onto the huddling, the terrified, the desperate?

If you did
not hear us then, hear me now. Take this offering, the last seed I carried from Arboria. Bless this seedling and make it grow. Let this seedling take root in the fertile soil of this new world. And when the machines come again, as they must, let this seedling stand proud, strong, and indomitable. Help us, Lightkeeper. Help me. Guide me to courage, for I have no courage left.

Guide

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Celestion

1.

Dish Network Protocols

Lore

Big horns! Too many errors in calibrations. Dominion dish network going out of whack. Not Chua fault. BIG HORN’S fault! So pay attention!

Dish network very sensitive. Calibrations very complicated. Big horns no good at calibrations. So big horns don’t try!

Is very simple. Need calibrations? Network go out? CALL A CHUA! Any Chua will do, but try to call Chua in charge of calibrations if big meaty claw-hands capable of properly using
datachron without stabbing self.

Why Draken even try to use machines? This should be Chua work! Must talk to superiors.

Anyway! Dish Network Protocols!

1. Call Chua before you do anything!
2. Don’t touch dish controls!
3. Seriously don’t!
4. Don’t touch auxiliary dish controls!
5. Don’t touch backup auxiliary controls!
6. See #1!

– Network Tech Rondo