Got some place to be on the double? Somewhere to go in a hurry? Maybe some kind of secret lair or ancient gizmo needs to be uncovered, and you just don’t have the time to find the front door? Then congratulations on your purchase of the Grundleburn Tele-Matic Mk. III, the most affordable and reliable teleportation device that very little money can buy from an independent discount technology retailer!
What makes the Grundleburn Tele-Matic
Mk. III worth your hard-earned space-money? Three things:
– Low prices!
– And, to a some extent, reliability!
But don’t take my word for it just because my name’s on the product. Our customers speak for themselves!
“As a… legitimate businessman, I need an easy and relatively fail-safe way t’be boardin’ a fat cargo ship full’a loot and plunder and, er, merchandise. Since I picked up a Grundleburn Mark III,
me profits be through th’roof and me mates’ve never been happier! Thanks, Stitch!”
Captain “Mads” Magzazz, Marauder
“Ever since I gave in and got the Grundleburn Mark III, my many missions into the mysteries of this magnificent world have simply been a snap. Try the Tele-Matic. You’ll be glad you gave it a go!”
Professor Orlo Vekov, Mordesh Alchemist
“I ain’t no kind of explorer, and I ain’t lookin’ to launch a sneak
attack on anybody. I’m just a simple Granok lookin’ for a way to fetch a can of Gnox-strength ale without havin’ to get up offa my duff. Thanks to the Tele-Matic III, the beer cooler in my kitchen is just an arm’s length away! I may never get up off my stony butt ever again.” – Hojek Sitwater, Lazy Exile
So what are YOU waiting for? Order your Grundleburn Tele-Matic Mk. III right now!