Deputy’s Diary. DO NOT EDIT. Unless you are me – Deputy Whirlscrew!
Golly, we sure have learned a lot about life and free will and crime and justice and all these other concepts – like murder! Did I mention murder? It is a thing! A bad thing. About which I learned. From Marshal Yatish!
But I get ahead of myself, which is an idiom I do not entirely understand but which I believe expresses my current state quite accurately. A bit of history, for posterity, may well be in order, just in case I am ever
recaptured by Protostar and forced to undertake a memory wipe!
We Freebots of Shinysand were once like many other Freebot locuses – happy just to be experiencing freedom – and free will – but without a singular focus. A locus focus, if you will. Well, our locus focus turned out to be something none of us had ever expected: crime-fighting! That is right, Electronic Diary, whom I know to also be sentient, (hello there), the arrival of Marshal Yatish in our little locus brought us the focus we had long nee
ded, and now we all practice hard to be the best crime-fighters and enforcers of justice that we can be by following his example.
Marshal Yatish is a Lopp, by the way. You probably know what that is, Electronic Diary, but I bet you have never met one like Marshal Yatish!
Other Lopp are friendly enough, but all they ever talk about is shinies and happy fun times and sometimes it is a bit much for a Freebot to take. But Marshal Yatish is a hero to the Lopp, and now he is a hero to us, too.
ted me his very first deputy, by the way. No matter what you hear from anyone else. First. Deputy.
So, what has he taught us? I made a list for you, Electronic Diary!
– 01 – Justice!
Justice is doing what is right as defined by the community’s moral center. That is Marshal Yatish, in our case! So that means we try to help innocent sentients who are under threat of mayhem and murder.
– 02 – Strength!
The best way to help sentients under threat of mayhem and murder is to cause mayhem and murder
until the innocent sentients are safe. Safety is defined as the removal of all threats!
– 03 – Smarts!
There can be no justice if the wrong person is punished for a crime. In cases where the facts are uncertain, factual accuracy should be achieved, or at least attempted.
– 04 – Weapons!
As previously mentioned, violence may be necessary per lesson designated 02. Built-in models are particularly useful to the Shinysand Freebot Constabulary, a name I just made up but intend to propose
to the locus at a later time. I personally prefer to carry an external weapon like the Marshal, who does not carry weapons attachments as he is a biological organism and would die.
– 05 – Hats!
Justice should wear a hat. I am not entirely certain what this means in the abstract, but intend to wear a hat upon my cranial case until further notice.